Carly Rae
ALIGNED & COMPASSIONATE

My Journal

Shanti

 

   It's been a week since I left home and every day I’ve been thinking about what I’m going to share with you all about this experience. When I was in Kenya, it was so easy to write a blog because I just wrote about my daily experiences—everything was so new and different. This blog is going to be different from that. Yes, I’m definitely going to write about the births because all of this is brand new for me, but I want to share more: my thoughts, feelings, passions. I want to share my heart while I’m here.

This is what’s on my mind tonight:

"Remember that there is so much strength in kindness, courage in connection, and bravery in tears; these qualities are the elixir that feeds our wild spirits—the fire that burns brightly in our beating hearts and breathes life into our weary souls. How to survive in this world, instead of surrendering to its sharpness, we must stay soft by loving and living, fiercely yet gently" –Zoe Quiney

   This is not an easy task, especially living in a world where the majority of people believe that you have to have thick skin and that only the toughest survive. This is a belief that has been ingrained in me and one that I am trying to break. Kindness, openness, and vulnerability is what I’m wanting to nurture, while I’m here and for my future.

“The bravest are the most tender; the loving are the daring.”—Bayard Joseph Taylor 

   On these trips, I fall harder and feel ten times deeper. I want to feel all the love, hurt, joy, grief, passion, and pain, all of it , fully, without being afraid or ashamed of any of it. My ability to own my shit, my feelings, is freedom. It’s something I want to share with others—to show them that they can do the same. Authenticity permeates all of us and it can be so moving. It is an overwhelming thing to think about, especially when sometimes all I can think about is how in the hell am I going to survive this trip? But I have to keep reminding myself I can do this: one minute, one person, one birth, one baby at a time.

 
Carly Beaudry